Are you disadvantaged?

The Department of Culture recently published a White Paper, the first from that department since Jennie Lee’s


in 1965, and apparently only its second ever. This chic pamphlet, in truth more PR exercise than policy google_ad_height = 90; document, prominently //--> contains that new-age mantra, “access must be increased for those from disadvantaged backgrounds”. The Arts Council
also write this
sort of optimistic guff, and they don’t mean it either. They only google_ad_width = 970; mean it if the

nothing happened. The disadvantaged, and presumably they mean anyone who doesn’t visit museums, weren’t seduced by free admission then and they won’t be today, or tomorrow.

If contemporary art

fanatics had their way they’d make gallery attendance compulsory, requiring a form of

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mass re-education: “You will watch this interminable google_ad_client = "ca-pub-3967079123942817"; video by


our favourite and extremely challenging blurry filmmaker from Kazakhstan


… who

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the Gwangdong Biennale.”

Access to museums already being free, how might the disadvantaged be forced into submission? Two possible answers suggest

they flee into

through a ballet or

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a ‘modern dance’, whatever that
is. Give me a Sergio/Yaya
one-two every time. No, let me

​ go a-disadvantaging myself cabbing Deltics at

Barrow Hill,


or trudging across Rivvie Pike, or tending the world’s most expensive courgettes, or watching whimbrels where they’re not

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supposed to be, or just google_ad_width = 970; having a few pints in the Cheshire Cheese (again). Rather any of these pastimes than visit a palace of google_ad_client = "ca-pub-3967079123942817"; bogus crap like Tate Modern.
Am I disadvantaged? Are you talking to me? Well are you talking to me?

This White Paper has the

self-congratulatory, de-haut-en-bas tone
associated with all Arts Council literature, which, suspiciously, this document closely resembles in appearance. Every page tells its own tinted
porky-pie diagram and

the most obsequious political correctness oozes like dripping from every letter. It has also decided, again like the Arts
in its own PR,

For detailed process, you can “visit here” or contact

what the outcomes will be even before policies have been implemented: “They will be inspired by their experiences and /* xin2 */ will be encouraged to

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inspire others.” Talk about
the Gestapo: “You vill be spired-in! Or you vill be shot!”